For the past year or so, I haven't been into makeup as I used to be. I don't really know the true reasons why, but I honestly think that its because I had given up. For awhile, I was aspired to become a makeup artist. Not to be conceited, but it wasn't only me who believed that I had the ability and talent to succeed in that industry. It was my form of art and in that sense, I was quite artistic.
I took a break from it all and found myself feeling incompetent to all the professional makeup artists out there. Who was I kidding? I didn't have the full training that many of them had... nor did I have 1/10th of all the tools and props that they did to succeed. Useless, it may seem to many... but you'd be surprised by how much people spend to get prettified. Makeup and the tools that are considered basics are not cheap. I obviously couldn't afford to get all of the professional paints, shadows, and brushes that I've seen others use. During one photo shoots that I did for stock photography, a professional actually did my makeup. The woman had huge cases on wheels just to carry all of her "goodies" (makeup). I was so envious... but felt like it was a dream to be surrounded by all those goodies. I was literally in euphoria!
As much fun as I had that day, I was discouraged and disappointed in myself for not having even a fraction of all those things she had. Therefore, I called it quits from then on. There was NO WAY that I could collect everything the artist had... especially when each individual item ranged from $14-$36 a piece! My gosh... and the woman had tens and twenty of thousands of dollars worth of makeup. (The fact that she's a former MAC artist and instructor didn't help my ego much either)
Lately though, I've been reminded of my talents. Today, in particular... Paline pointed out (via email) that I could succeed in it if I just continued it... even in the future. Mikal asked me about this not too long ago also... just last weekend in Las Vegas, actually. * sigh *
Maybe this will be a good resolution for me... to pick up something that I've loved for so long, but have lost and allowed to be overshadowed by the many other things that I had going on in my life.
Today, I treated myself to three full size pigments, a new mascara that I lost in Vegas, a new eyeliner, and another sharpener. The gift card that Sam got me awhile back along with the many other goodies (thanks babe!) really came in handy. I shall go and play now...