March 10, 2009


The biopsy test results didn't come in today as expected. My Sister and I got to the hospital around 8am... couldn't get much sleep last night either. HOW do you go to bed peacefully knowing that someone you love so much is suffering and in so much pain? We tried not to leave his side at any time because we knew that he was scared and didn't want to be alone. Everytime that we had to step out of his room, we'd let him know. He hated being alone, we can tell.

My two sisters, my cousin, and I were asked to speak to the doctor to figure out where we are at at this point. It was an emotional and difficult one... probably the hardest hour I've had to sit through. My oldest sister is unofficially our family's spokesperson, and I really don't know how she does it. I am very thankful for her... especially during times like these.

My Uncle was doing so well yesterday. He wanted to get better and tried his very best to do what he can that we told him might make him feel better and stronger. Today, I told him that stretching will help his muscles and five minutes later, he asked me to help him stretch.

It took a turn today. He was not feeling well and started throwing up blood. It started once every few hours. Before I left, it was every twenty minutes. I asked the nurse how long this vomiting would last... and she told me that it will last "until its over"... you know what that means. I was not prepared for this... especially after seeing what I thought was progress yesterday.

Its 12:30am... told my cousin that I'll be at the hospital by 5:30am so that he can go to work. Tempted to just go back now. I can't rest nor sleep like this.

He HAS to get better... at least for a little bit so that he can finally enjoy life. He'd worked too hard all his life. This just isn't fair.

I love you, Uncle! You will get better... you have to. I have faith in you... I really, really, do.

(I can't express how I truly feel at the moment... no words can really explain this hurt and pain I feel right now.)

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